


This is Why You Don't Gloat, Tony

by quartermile



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Domestic Avengers, Lost Child, M/M, Past Mpreg, Tony hates Asgardian magic, Tumblr Prompt, i just really enjoy the idea of a small Peter being frostiron spawn, supermarket
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-28
Updated: 2014-10-28
Packaged: 2018-02-23 01:06:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,154
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2528339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quartermile/pseuds/quartermile
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Inspired by this: <em>Imagine your OTP going to the supermarket with their child. Person B gets distracted for just a second and the kid is  gone. Person B freaks out and runs through every aisle looking for the kid while Person A stays quiet. Person B comes back to yell at Person A that they are not helping, just to find them with the child in the cart.- otpprompts.tumblr.com </em></p>
<p>You'll notice I changed it a bit, but the idea is still there. I thought it was adorable and funny. It didn't really turn out the way I expected but here it is. Also, I'm considering writing this prompt with Stucky as well. Let me know if you're interested in that!</p>
            </blockquote>





	This is Why You Don't Gloat, Tony

"Sir, Loki is requesting entry," Jarvis' crisp voice rings out through the workshop, cutting silent the music that Tony has blaring throughout it.

"Let him in," Tony tells him. Loki has refused the code Tony offered him that means he can gain entry whenever he wants to the shop. He says if Tony doesn't want anyone inside at times like he so often does, it's unfair of him to use the code for that and if's an emergency, well. Loki has his magic. He can teleport.

The door opens quietly and the God's footsteps are silent as always, so it's only a _small_ shock when the tricksters voice speaks from behind Tony, "Darling, are you ready?"

"Of course I'm ready. I'm always ready, Lokitty," Tony says straightening up and laying down his soldering wand, "Ready for what?"

Loki rolls his emerald eyes, "Our trip to the market. I told you this morning, Anthony. We were going to go grocery shopping and you agreed to come along."

"Isn't that right before you stuck your hand down my pants? I think I get a pass on forgetting this time for that," Tony quips back.

"You're impossible. Yes, that's when I'm referring. Now come on. I've already dressed Peter and he's waiting. Your technology will be here when you return," Loki says. 

"Fine," Tony says, making a show of sulking, though he doesn't mind. He loves spending time out flaunting his husband and their baby. And if he also gets to take Peter to the electronics section and gloat about how much greater his tech is than those companies, well that's a different story and different kind of fun.

"Do not sulk, Anthony, it is unbecoming," Loki says, a thinly veiled grin on his lips as they walk up to the common area where Peter is waiting, balancing on his belly beside Clint on the back of the couch, Brave playing on tv.

"Come on, Petey Boy. Time to go shopping!" Tony says, grabbing the small boy by his ankles and lifting him up, playfully "banging" his head on the floor, though he does nothing more than touch his hair.

"Daddy stop!!" Peter giggles, shrieking as he tries to grab at Tony's legs to keep from swinging, "Unca Clint, help me!"

Clint makes a show of falling backwards onto the couch cushions, making his body completely still, "OH! I've been frozen! I can not help young Peter from the vicious beast!"

"But you're talking still!" Peter giggles, grasping at Tony's head as he flips him over, lifting him onto his shoulders to ride.

"I don't think even a freeze ray could keep Barton's mouth shut," Tony says.

Clint's reply is drowned out by Jarvis helpfully playing a soundclip of the beeping that covers swear words in tv shows, so Tony knows it's quite colorful. After all, Peter is only four and a half. He does not need to hear such words.

-=-

"If you want to get the food and stuff, Peter and I will go look at the toys," Tony says.

"You know I quite enjoy shopping for food, dear," Loki says. Indeed he does. Tony had found early on in their relationship that Loki rather enjoys perusing food selections and things, given how it's so differed here on Midgard and he loves to cook. So instead of Tony having all of his groceries delivered to the tower, he and Loki go and shop sometimes for their own. 

"Just do not take him by the electronics to gloat, Anthony. He does not need to learn to be arrogant," Loki says with a pointed look, though his lips quirk into a grin, "Though with you as his father, I don't see how he won't."

"Me? Have you ever met yourself," Tony says, laughing.

"Well yes. I have used my clones many a time during fight," Loki says.

"That was rhetorical, dollface," Tony pouts, slumping his shoulders when Loki kisses him, knowing he'd won. As he kisses back, he pops out of his short sulk, grinning and taking their son's hand, "Come on Petey!"

The two spend close to an hour on the toy aisles, playing with every toy they can find that isn't covered in those ties that keep them to the cardboard. They end up setting up a whole scene of army men battling dinosaurs and dragons on one aisle and a scene with actions figures of the Avengers battling some sludge monsters which Tony is pretty sure are Pokemon on another.

Tony lets Peter pick out whatever toys he wants to buy. It was a mutual decision between Tony and Loki to teach Peter early on how to handle money, given that one day he will be a part of Stark Industries fortune, and Tony didn't want him to go through the phase he did of blowing all his money because he didn't know what to do with it. So they give Peter an allowance each week for being good and whenever he helps out cooking or cleaning up or down in the lab with Tony. He's learning fast that doing good things earn him money and he can spend it whatever way he wants, and if he saves, he'll have even more money to spend. Tony and Loki act as his bank, so he can know at any time how much he's saving, and the mini-genuis definitely loves keeping track.

Of course there are many occasions where the allowance is foregoed and Tony just buys him whatever he wants to along with all the things he makes him in his shop, cause he's Tony Stark and he does whatever he wants.

Peter chooses a tub of the army men like the ones they'd set up in the aisles, along with a new model Captain America action figure that he buys for his Uncle Phil, along with a landscape set of mountains, rocks and trees. Those will really be fun, he thinks.

"Alright, let's go find your mom," Tony says, grinning as he situates all of the toys in his arms.

Peter giggles beside him as he walks with him, "Deedee told you not to call him mom anymore!" 

"Shh, don't tell him," Tony grins to the small boy, "Ohh! There's the new iPad. Come on! Let's take a quick peek so I can see how much better I am." he says. He knows it's pretty ridiculous but he doesn't do it for his own arrogance. He does it because he loves to see the awe on his son's face as he explains the things of the gadgets that he has better versions of. The little boy looks up to him, something Tony never got to do as a kid, so he gladly feeds it in any way possible - even if he does go a little far sometimes.

"It even is so much thicker. The Starkpads are _half_ the thickess and weight of these things," Tony rambles on after a five minute long monologue about the iPad, "See, you should be so proud to be a Stark, Pete- ...Peter?" He asks, looking around, not seeing the dark haired tot.

"Peter?" He asks again, his eyes widening as he frantically looks around the aisle to find nothing. He rushes down the next few aisles, looking in all of the little areas that a small child could get into, "Peter??"

"Petey, baby, where are you?" he whisper-yells, knowing if he's too loud, Loki will easily hear. He probably somehow already knows and that thought makes Tony gulp. He opens a entertainment center nearby, peeking inside to see if the boy decided to play hide and seek.

Nope. Nothing.

" _Peter?_ " he squeaks.

"Oh my Loki, he is going to kill me," Tony mutters satirically, the fear of what his husband will do to him for losing their child overriding the worry of having lost him. He knows without a doubt that Loki would be able to locate a wandering child, so that's not the problem. The problem is trying to find him before Loki even has to know.

He checks the garbage can near the electronics' check out counter just in case the boy's crawled in, he even checks the bin of dvds, the bin of bouncing balls, and wonders how difficult it would be to find a ladder to check inside the cieling before deciding that would be useless.

It only takes about ten more minutes of Tony flitting about the entertainment section and the surrounding areas calling quietly for the boy before he must admit defeat. The parent in him winning out easily over his desire to not be destroyed by the green eyed God, because wandering child, easy to find. Wandering child who could've gotten snatched up by a kidnapper, not so much.

His shoulders droop and he sulks, not wanting to go find his husband, but knowing he has to for the sake of his child. Don't let it ever be said that Tony doesn't care about his son; he would do anything in his power to do right by that little boy, but have you ever face down an angry Demi-God? You'd understand. 

He finds Loki in the spices section, piercing green eyes already tracking his movements down the aisle. The eyes flick to either side of him, cocking an eyebrow as he spots no Peter beside him.

"Anthony?" he presses.

"I didn't mean to we were looking at the iPads and I did what you told me not to do and was gloating and then I looked around and I couldn't find Peter and I looked all around and I don't know where he went and I'm sorry I didn't mean to lose our son can you help me find him, please," Tony rambles. He doesn't flinch away from Loki, he doesn't.

"No," Loki says simply.

"What?" That truly shocks Tony there. He knows how much Loki loves their son. Would he really sacrifice his well-being to teach Tony a lesson, "What the hell, Loke? He could be running in front of cars in the parking lot or playing with kitchen knives or in the trunk of some skeevy guy's car!" he exclaims, arms flailing about.

"I believe that would be your fault, Anthony dear," Loki drawls slowly, "but shouldn't you know that Peter knows better than to run into traffic. Besides-"

"My fault?! He got away from me but I didn't mean to lose him! Are you seriously suggesting you're not going to help me?!" He exclaims, glad there's no one on this aisle or else paparazzi would be all over this shit. He's yelling pretty loud. It's not like he's necessarily mad at Loki (except maybe a little for refusing to help) but he's panicking over maybe having to somehow find Peter on his own. He's pretty good at most stuff, he is a genius afer all, but the safety of his child is at stake, here, "He's probably scared and alone! And Cold!"

"It is nearly eighty degrees out, dear," Loki replies, reaching out and grabbing another bottle of spices, reading over the ingredients before taking the top off and sniffing the contents. He glances over to a dumbfounded Tony, innocently raising an eyebrow, "What?"

"What?! Our son is missing and all you're worried about is spices?! Bruce was right! Bag of cats! Bag of cats!" he exclaims, the familiar tease leaving his mouth in his panic.

"By the Gods, Anthony, please quiet down before someone calls your photographers," Loki says, rolling his eyes and stepping to the side, "Peter is perfectly safe."

Tony stops short in his rant, his mouth shutting as he stares into the cart where the small brown haired boy is sleeping, curled up inside it, "Wh-wh- what..." he stammers.

"He came to find me about twenty minutes ago. I let him sit in the cart and he fell asleep." Loki replies simply, placing the bottle back onto the shelf before picking up another one, "What do you think of this one? Cinnamon? What is it good for?"

"Bruce puts it in coffee. It's good with apples," Tony mumbles offhandedly, his eyes still wide as he looks back up at Loki, "So he's been here this whole time..?"

"Yes," Loki replies, "And don't think you're off the proverbial hook, dear. You will still be in trouble for losing our child."

"But... But I didn't lose him. He's found, see?" Tony says, motioning pointlessly into the cart.

"You did not know that," he replies, "and you did not come to me, so yes, you're in trouble. That goes to show you there is no good in gloating."

"You used to gloat all the time! And tried to take over Earth!" Tony blurts in attempt to get out of punishment.

"Yes, and I was nearly banished to some unknown realm for that," Loki says, waving his hand and Tony suddenly finds his voice muted. 

He really hates magic.


End file.
